How to Endure a Critical and Non-Supportive Leader

Critical leader
How do you deal with a critical and unsupportive leader? (Lightstock)

I was talking to a younger leader recently. He is feeling under-appreciated.

His boss, the senior leader, never notices the work that he is doing. Even worse, for this senior leader, criticism flows easily. He never misses a mistake.

I get it. That leader could be me at times. I'm bad about celebrating. I'm wired for constant improvement. It's something I'm conscious of and work on, but it takes consistent discipline on my part.

On the other hand, the new generation of leaders was born into a system that afforded instant and constant recognition. In my days, A's were expected in school. So we didn't always celebrate them. If we did it was at the end of the year. These days an A on a test may get a steak dinner.

I'm not criticizing. And, I'm not making excuses. My generation enabled this generation. I am just pointing out a difference in generational expectations. So, the reality is this senior leader may not even recognize the problem this younger leader is experiencing. He doesn't see the problems with the way he is leading.

And I'm not saying that as an excuse. From the way this senior leader was described to me, his behavior is wrong, demeaning and certainly not conducive to produce the most excellent team environment or one that develops leaders—in my opinion—in any generation.

But the question from this younger leader was how to respond. For a variety of reasons, he doesn't feel the freedom to move on to something new right now. So what does he do today?

Well, first and foremost I told this younger leader he should not get his hopes up that things might change anytime soon. They might. Maybe the leader will read the right book or some masterful blog post and a conversion experience will occur in how this leader leads. Not likely.

But, what I can say is that, in spite of the deficiency in his leadership, the senior leader probably still has something he can teach the younger leader. So be respectful. There will likely be other occasions in his leadership where he will have to display respect to someone even if he doesn't agree with that person. Maybe it will be simply to keep his job. Maybe it will be in obedience to Scripture (Rom. 13).

The fact is the way we honor those we don't naturally respect says a lot about our character.

But the other thing I would say—and I think this is huge—is that you can learn good principles under bad leadership. You can. You can learn what not to do by watching what others do wrong. Right now this young leader is developing good leadership practices by acknowledging what has injured him that he would never do to injure someone he is leading.

Take notes. Grow. Learn. Prepare now for how you'll lead then.

We will always need better leaders. Be one. And, if you're serving under a critical, non-supportive leader, you're in a great training ground.

Ron Edmondson is the senior pastor at Immanuel Baptist Church in Lexington, Kentucky. For the original article, visit ronedmondson.com.

Get Spirit-filled content delivered right to your inbox! Click here to subscribe to our newsletter.


Dr. Mark Rutland's

National Institute of Christian Leadership (NICL)

The NICL is one of the top leadership training programs in the U.S. taught by Dr. Mark Rutland. If you're the type of leader that likes to have total control over every aspect of your ministry and your future success, the NICL is right for you!

FREE NICL MINI-COURSE - Enroll for 3-hours of training from Dr. Rutland's full leadership course. Experience the NICL and decide if this training is right for you and your team.

Do you feel stuck? Do you feel like you’re not growing? Do you need help from an expert in leadership? There is no other leadership training like the NICL. Gain the leadership skills and confidence you need to lead your church, business or ministry. Get ready to accomplish all of your God-given dreams. CLICK HERE for NICL training dates and details.

The NICL Online is an option for any leader with time or schedule constraints. It's also for leaders who want to expedite their training to receive advanced standing for Master Level credit hours. Work through Dr. Rutland's full training from the comfort of your home or ministry at your pace. Learn more about NICL Online. Learn more about NICL Online.

Charisma Leader — Serving and empowering church leaders